Imagine for a minute your neighbor Bob trying to play professional basketball, or hack it out on the PGA Tour. It would be hilarious, yes, but also an exercise in futility. Bob is a slightly overweight, middle-aged accountant, and while he plays golf three times a week and shoots hoops in the driveway every night, trying to go out and compete with pros would be embarrassing.

Now imagine yourself, a trained and adept rider, but by no means a professional. What if you were told you had to go race a thoroughbred over fences at one of the sport’s biggest stages? You wouldn’t be worried about your self-esteem so much as your life.

Which brings us to the UK for the Cheltenham Festival, a week’s worth of high stakes hunt racing, smartly dressed horses and all out human debauchery (since 1860).

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