August 7, 2016 
Say, you wanted to incite a furor of media attention on Day One of the Olympics. Naturally, you’d recruit a few your most diabolical friends and evil acquaintances to ponder your best plan of attack.
If it was a Hollywood set—hypothetically speaking—you and your motley crew of seedy-but-loveable-no-gooders would be found manspreading around a dingy kitchen table in the underbelly of an abandoned building. Drumming up ways to pull the trigger on media rage whilst knocking back a few cold ones. Cigarette dangling from your lip.
Friend 1: “A terrorist attack! That’s guaranteed to capture headlines.”
You: “Nah. Too bloody depressing.”
Friend 2: “How about something on human waste in the water? People get fired up about that!”
You: “Ugh. It’s been done to death. The water’s polluted. WE GET IT…No, we need something fresh. Something that implies danger without anyone actually getting hurt. You know, something newsy.”
Friend 3: “Oooh! I’ve got it! Fire a random gun at the media tent. All those journalists in one place, it’ll set the lion’s den on fire!”
You: “GENIUS.”
* * * * * * * *
Whether such a conversation took place, we don’t know. Because we don’t much of anything at this point. Aside from the fact that one stray bullet did indeed pierce the tented wall of the media center around one o’clock this afternoon. Thankfully, no one was hurt.
According to Horse & Hound, the bronze-colored bullet, which landed on but did not mar the carpet near British photographer Jon Stroud, was identified locally as a 5.56mm assault rifle round.
It’s a likely scenario given that the Deodoro Equestrian Center is a military venue, teeming with military personnel, all of whom appear to carry guns, including 5.56mm assault rifles.
The safe bet: a gun was accidentally discharged by a member of the military. But that’s not the official story. At least, not yet.
Said Rio 2016 Director of Communications Mario Andrade:
“The weapon has not been identified. At least, it hasn’t been disclosed to me. We don’t know where the bullet is coming from. We don’t know if it is coming from any of the training facility. It’s a very sensitive situation, so we need to investigate and clarify everything before we can give you precise information.”
Despite this lack of information about the particulars of The Bullet, Andrade said the security team “emphasized that they have 100% assurance that it has nothing to do with the Games.”
“Authorities can already clearly determined that this area [the press office] was not the target. It was a stray bullet. They can also confirm that it has nothing to do with the Games. But I cannot be more precise at the moment.”
None of which makes much sense. More information has been promised as the investigation unfolds.
In the meantime, we do know one thing for sure: eventing dressage gets wildly more exciting when stray bullets are involved.
