July 7, 2023 
SHROPSHIRE, UNITED KINGDOM—“Teddy,” the newly internet-famous Welsh pony of the “killer pony” video on Reels and TikTok, isn’t in on the joke.
The widely circulated and remixed meme, which states, “The chances of being killed by a pony are low…but never zero,” has been deemed highly offensive by Teddy, a career children’s pony who took to Twitter (via his animal communicator) over the weekend to express his anger.
In response, Teddy’s tweet drew a slew of replies in support of the pony, with many commenters—from former walk/trot riders to worldwide animal rights groups—calling on the stable worker responsible for distributing the pony’s image without his knowledge to offer a formal apology.
A legal representative for Teddy the Pony said no amount of organic carrots, apples, or German Horse Muffins could make up for the damage to his reputation—not to mention the emotional distress he’d so far been subjected to:
“Teddy has been deeply injured by the creation of this meme and its rapid proliferation across social media channels.
“He has lost regular riders as a result of this. On the advice of their sollicitors, the trainer and barn owners had to put a disclaimer notice up at the barn entranceway. Tween-aged kids run screaming from him in the crossties, convinced he is a tiny maniac intent on their demise.
“Frankly, there is no way to calculate the damage that Teddy has so far endured—and for what? So that a couple of Gen Z kids could have a chuckle at his expense? Where is the justice in that?”
We attempted to reach Teddy for comment at home in his Shropshire stable. Unfortunately, we did not realize Teddy was actually in his stall, but eating hay out of view, and walked by him several times without noticing, missing our opportunity. Horse Network regrets the error.
